Where to start? Uh...
Well, my breaks as'ploded yesterday and I had to call a tow. A wonderful Good Samaritan helped me out and another Good Samaritan used some connections to get my car to a fixing place. Work had to pick me up while someone was already out on a transport. My phone died, Nate got turned down from the Wisconsin company, work was crazy-crazy, but I'm still here. Still here waiting for the fixing place to call so I can drag Nate's (also broken) car to said place and trade. It's been....three months since the Honda's antifreeze line popped and the only reason it's even getting to the shop is because I don't really want to walk there. I'm determined, darn it. ::Sigh:: I had such high hopes for today, too. Do you ever get a good feeling about a day? Like you know for sure that day is going to have something big and awesome happen? I felt that way yesterday about today and lets just say I'm less than...enthusiastic. Haha, but it's funny! I'm grateful that my brakes decided to die in a nice and safe parking lot right in front of my house, grateful that people helped me and that I still managed to get to work to make some money, grateful that even though Nathan had a shitty day that he listened to me bitch before talking about his own problems. Grateful that no one was seriously hurt yesterday despite all the craziness at and out of work.
Right now I just want my car back ^_^;; I want to get this taken care of. I want to make the perilous drive (probably only a mile, if that) to the fixing place in Nate's car with the broken driver seat (yup, I can't move the seat forward so I'll be bringing pillows so I can reach the pedals. Oh, this is gonna be hilarious, haha). I don't want to sit down to a movie or video games knowing I'm supposed to get a call from Mister Fixit.
Oh, other good thing. I can /afford/ the bill. Sweet Jesus, but it's expensive. Mister Fixit sounded very sorry about the price and I commend him for that, but since I can't change the price, there really isn't anything I can do.
...Unless I find coupons online :D I'm a genius and will also save 20 bucks. Woo! I hope they call soon. Gaaaah.
::sigh::

When life hands you lemons, make some damn fine lemonade.

9_9 AWAKE.

Been having trouble sleeping - which is kind of becoming the norm - and woke up at the lovely hour of 7am because the manpiece forgot to turn off his alarm ^_^;; Laid under the covers for another thirty minutes before deciding to eat breakfast. Heh, only to go back to bed after devouring the bagel. So here we are. Last night actually felt like a small success at work. I ended up walking out the door 15 minutes late because midnight shift change got a little interesting, but at least I earned some candy. And a little smiley stress ball. Woo! A coworker is asking for me to work a double on Saturday. Still need to think about it. Yes, I heart money, but I also heart sleep and don't feel too inclined for 24 almost-straight-hours on one unit. Gah. We'll ponder it and give her an answer by Wednesday, right?\


Aaanyway, doot di doot. I reeeeeeeeeally want lunch :D

TIME FOR FOOD.

In honor of my sister:


Life has been crazy. Last week went home to see my nephew for the first time; he's adorable and is just the cutest little sack of potatoes you ever did see. Haha, when I held him for the first time, Les just handed him to me and left the room. I freaked out 9_9;; Thought I was gonna break him or something, but she said, "Just don't drop him, support the head, and you'll be fine." Jeez. It was a good visit. In other news, she's ditching the husband. Apparently he's still an ass. I'm behind her 100% - some things I saw when I visited I definitely didn't approve of (though it's not my place to say what happens in her life), so I'm all for her decision. Nathan says I'm just anti-marriage. And maybe I am. Maybe.
Soooo the cop thing might not pan out here, but Nathan seems to have something in the works again as far as interviews go. Who knows? Maybe it'll happen. Maybe. I'm happy with the decisions I'm making now, though, and that's enough. I'm taking his advice (as much as I'm able) about not worrying about the future. It'll sort itself out but for now I've got to have some fun and relax. Oh, he hides the booze from me, so I'm not talking about getting trashed. I'll admit I was self-medicating with the alcohol for awhile. Like half the summer. My head was not in a good space and I wasn't talking to anyone about the specifics, the real specifics. Only to myself at night wasted on whiskey shots or vodka or both. But lets not dwell on that. It's over and I'm sipping mango juice or ginger soda or whatever it is and doing fine. Kristal went to the Body Farm and I need to hear how that went. Only 11 more weeks until this semester is completely over. Things are...changing. It's a good thing.


Haha.

"All things change, and we with them." -Nathan
"All knowledge really does is change people." -Anne Rice [paraphrased]

So where does this leave us? Hell if I know. Hahaha, jeez.

This is for me.

Aaaand we're back. Times are a'changin'. Last Monday Les gave birth to a baby boy, Brody. I'll be going back home this week for a bit to visit and catch up. Nate haunted the job fairs/info sessions and we're just hoping something good happens. In the meantime I'm waiting to hear back from the cops. Fingers crossed.
We went to the park and the zoo yesterday. It was very nice :) Work was quick and easy and hopefully tonight is more of the same.


Uuuuh, I think I'll snuggle on Nathan now.

Jeez.


As I told Kristal:
I'm terrified I'm going to have to choose between the career I've always worked toward and the romance I never knew I wanted.

What crap. What drama. I'm sure it's a movie somewhere. A sappy chick flick that's supposed to empower women but only perpetuates old stereotypes.
He wants me to stay with him, to see my dreams with him - where /he/ goes. It still all seems like gambling. Ugh.
Could I give him up? Yes. Would it kill a part of me to do so? Yes. Would I be happy again? Yes. Everything works out for the best, Les says.
I told him last night that us moving doesn't feel like starting over, but finally starting period. I feel stuck here. Even if I got the cop job, I suspect (pun intended) that I'd still feel stagnant until I could transfer out. The plan was never to stay here.

UUUUGH.


That's enough for today.
There is no right answer for this.

...Holy moly, los frijoles! The cops called. I...am still in the applicant pool. Like, I'm going in next week for a polygraph. Wow. Didn't see that coming. In fact, they sent me an email about the open position being filled. More wow. Errr.....yeah. Haha, I've always wanted this opportunity, ya know? Nothing is going to stop me. What about my lover, you ask? Well, if I get the job, then it'll be his turn to decide what he wants to do. I've never hidden the fact that I'm career oriented. Also said I'd stay here if I got the job. We'll see. Lets not borrow trouble, eh? Haha, still can't believe that I'm still in the running. Jeez. Talk about surprised.
The sister hasn't delivered yet, but hopefully soon. She's ready to be done, haaa.






Underwear is overrated.

Despite wanting to sleep forever this morning and having zero motivation to do anything, I've been rather productive. After a typical gym visit, I started on laundry, going through various large plastic containers around the house to see what's in 'em and to see if there's stuff I can ditch. I've got a collection of various odds and ends on the bed upstairs that I want to donate or otherwise get rid of. Nate can dig through the pile when he's home. I'm washing old blankets and assorted hats and mittens at the moment. Mmmm clean laundry. Vacuuming is the only thing I've yet to do and since I don't like to vacuum, it can wait ^_^;; If only Nathan actually liked vacuuming (or didn't outwardly dislike it as I do) then I'd pawn it off on him. Hee. It's windy enough that it's kind of cool outside now. The air conditioning is off because I'm cheap and because outside smells good. Oh! And I'm airing out more blankets and pillows on the couch. Such a busy body. I've got some birthday money left and am wondering what to do with it. On one hand I have Granny and Les telling me to do something fun (like buy some whiskey, a new movie, or video game) and on the other hand I've got my nerdy self saying to save it (for...something...donno what). Soooo I don't know what to do with it. It's only 20 bucks, but that's a lot, really. Really. Oooo such a charmed life I have that the only worry of this Thursday is whether to remove self control (and pride) and buy cheap whiskey and a 5-dollar dvd or not. I'm feeling good today. Oh! And I payed in the mud :3 The sunflowers sort of blew over so I dug around and got all icky putting in more stakes and moving some soil-filled buckets around. This was right after the gym, too, so not only was I all sweaty, but then became covered in mud and bug parts. Joy :D And I sewed a shirt! Gaaah, maybe this will be the last fall we see in The College Town. Interesting thought. Aaaand now I'm hungry for dinner. I know the manpiece wants to cook up that hamburger meat. OH! Hmmm...and I've still got some work I could do tonight about the Stuff To Give Away list and the knife-sharpening stuff and...yeah.


Happy Thursday.
I'm sweaty.

Aaaaah, day off number two is going swimmingly. I spent last night and this morning fixing up Morgan's old laptop and now it works quite well. Only quirks about the machine are four dead pixel lines on the screen and a touchy keyboard/mouse pad thing. Considering that it's free, I'll not complain. I've name it Sphinx and here's hoping I can use it for stuff. Ooo, it's raining :) That means it'll cool off a bit and I won't have to water the plants today. Woo! Yesterday I meandered to campus and got into a bonus swing dance. I'm 50/50 about going tonight as it's raining. I'm also lazy and just want to make a pie today and watch Xena reruns ^_^;;; Les has all 6 seasons (are there only six?) on dvd so whenever I visit her, we might watch some.

Ugh. Wow. Things are moving quite along, aren't they? Hmm...thought I felt like posting, but apparently not. There are things I'd like to discuss, but now's not the time. Today is a good day to rest and do things that make me happy - like make homemade bread and pie. Dude, I totally have all afternoon and evening to make some tasty bread. I'd like that. It'll clear my head from what Nathan mentioned last night. If you know me, you might be able to guess what he brought up and what I quickly changed the subject about.

Me - a commitment phobe?
Naw.



We do what we must to follow our dreams.
Viam inveniam aut faciam.

I AM SO HUNGRY FOR THE PIZZA I AM SMELLING.
Ooo it's almost done!

Uhh...yeah.

Posting because I'm hungry. Makes sense ^_^;; Ugh, morning shifts are rough on me, at least when I'm routinely getting only 6 hours of sleep. Only one more to do this week and then...hopefully /next/ week will be a little different. Oh lawl. The whole situation is laughable. It's gotta be. I talked with a woman at work and our discussion basically boiled down to two hard facts. She does her job because she must fix people. I stay at my job because I can laugh at everything.

And because it matters.

Buuuut this isn't one of those kinds of posts.
Moving on.
Seventeen weeks - hoo rah! Maybe something good will happen. Granny says everything happens for a reason. Not sure if I buy all that, but there's definitely something to gain from every situation. The boyfriend was very lovey last night. It was nice, but uncharacteristic. ::shrug:: I'm suspicious of everyone now, it seems. Kevin warned me about it, but there it is.
Gah. Ross is pissing me off with this on-again-off-again attitude toward Les. She's a stronger woman than I'll ever be. She'll take excellent care of then almost-nephew, that's for sure, but what about the daddy? I'd sooner kick him in the head than hug the bastard right now. If his parents are still supporting their grandchild, more power to them. But if the nugget comes out while I have plenty of time to be up there, then it will be so. No, I'm not going to go out and start trouble. No, I'm not too big for my britches or however the expression goes. Just annoyed.

But really, aside from the all-of-a-sudden-crazy-family! drama, everything is the same as ever. I wait. Nate works. I work. Nate studies.
We live.
We love.
We joke about naked people.